It’s five years this Thursday......FIVE YEARS....sometimes seems like yesterday, where has that time gone. I’d hoped to be in a different place,state of mind, have found some inner happiness, and of course to a certain extent l have. Have moved, a home and she wraps herself around me and a garden that soothes the soul. I should be happy shouldn’t l? So why am l not.
The life l have has sooo much to be thankful for, and l am, but I’d trade it all in to have him back. I have made a new life, left the old one behind, including friends and family, new friends, new life, it’s the only way l can move on. But the hole which is still there, may be smaller, but still hurts like hell.
It’s easier to watch couples, envy tinged with a little sadness for them, they, at some stage have this to come. Who would want this.
Tried the dating game, met many men, it isn’t going to do it for me, big boots to fill, so will love, pamper and spoil myself. Is it easier, some days a struggle, especially this month, but I’m very lucky, wish for nothing......so will wallow this week, cry as and when, go breath in my garden, look at my view, and try to be thankful. Love to all, its a hard road. 💋💋