Author Topic: 2 weeks  (Read 1915 times)

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Offline Nat1985

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2 weeks
« on: July 04, 2018, 07:51:42 AM »
It's been 2 weeks since my 2 year old son James passed. He had been sedated and on a breathing tube for almost 2 weeks after choking on a bit of sausage at breakfast on holiday at butlins. The hospital tried so much to let his brain rest before bringing him round but he was having continuous seizures which even on very high meds he was building a tolerance to and lost his fight on 20th June.

I know I was coping better last week. There was supportive messages lots to plan and his touch and voice were somehow still within reach.
Now I'm slipping. My mind and body now knows he simply is not coming back. Time is not healing me, each day feels worse when I wake up and see James not there beside me anymore. I don't know what to do with myself. Everyone that has been so supportive while he was in hospital, 4 weeks since we were rushed in people have gone back to their lives leaving me so lonely. I have no partner or other children and my mum is just as broken as me. I just don't know what to say or do

Offline Emz2014

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Re: 2 weeks
« Reply #1 on: July 05, 2018, 07:27:09 AM »
It is truly a rollercoaster journey. The first few weeks it seems we are in shock, theres lots to do/concentrate on and people around. It does seem that often people drift back to their lives and they can sometimes think all is fine again after the funeral - we however know the truth, it's just the start of our personal journey

It is hard to hear at this stage but time will help. It will ease in time, but we have many stages and many emotions on the journey. There will be dark days when you cannot see it getting better but hold on in there as light will return.  It can sometimes feel a very slow journey, so just concentrate on those little steps forward

At the early stages sometimes all we can do is tackle one day at a time, and on particularly bad days an hour at a time.  We are here with you on the journey, keep talking to us  :hug:

Xx
Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise. 
Hold on in there xx

Offline dizzylizzy

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Re: 2 weeks
« Reply #2 on: July 15, 2018, 03:52:28 PM »
I am so, so sorry for your loss. Many people simply won’t know what to say - or how to reach out. Post on here when every you need to. You will fine not alone although grief is indeeed a lovely time. ❤️

Offline VCWH2018

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Re: 2 weeks
« Reply #3 on: July 16, 2018, 03:24:19 PM »
I lost my mum 6 weeks ago and I too feel very raw at the moment.  All I can say is to take it one day at a time. 

I read recently a piece about how a bereavement is like being shipwrecked during a storm,  at first youre left clinging on to a memory or something and the grief is like giant waves coming over you so fast and frequently that you can barely breathe but eventually they lessen in size and frequency.  I still feel like mine are very large and coming in many times a day - but I can see that having survived the first month that the waves will become more navigable.  I will not drown - I cannot, I have to be here for my father.

I've cried every day and am desperate to have the one day when I don't sob uncontrollably - even if I then cry for months afterwards, and today won't be that day either (as I just spoke to my father on the phone and I found it very tough) - but I hope that a day without sobbing is on my horizon and if and when it happens I'll be able to believe that at some point there will be more of those.  Hopefully you will find this too.

Meanwhile I keep tissues on hand and exit swiftly to the loos if I'm at work.

Offline Emz2014

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Re: 2 weeks
« Reply #4 on: July 16, 2018, 09:04:31 PM »
The shipwreak analogy is a good description  :hug:   the waves will ease in time xx
Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise. 
Hold on in there xx