So sad now.

[sallymk1]

Hello there. Had the funeral two days ago. It was extremely well attended but the bit where you had to stand by the memorial flowers for folks to give condolences was hard - no that not so true it was all hard and felt unreal. Today is the eve of four weeks since he passed. Its getting harder not easier. Feeling so low, so lonely and not coping. I don't want to feel like this at all. My sons were with me throughout otherwise I don't know what I would have done but they have gone back to their lives now.
Is anyone else experiencing intense anxiety, especially when out and about. My friend called round today and we went for a pub meal, I was literally shaking when we got back. The same thing happened yesterday when I drove my son to the train station. This is not me at all and it is scaring me a bit.

[Emz2014]

I felt it got harder after the funeral, people drifted back to their lives, the rush of organising is done.  Its a rollercoaster journey - it will start to get easier, I promise. Try and take one step at a time and rest when you need to  xx

[Karena]

I suffered quite a lot from anxiety including panic attacks.It is not unusual but part of this horrid journey.I don't have panic attacks any more but anxiety is still something I do struggle with.Having said that I have learned too stratergise and plan ahead to reduce that.Some quite straight forward things like giving a friend a key so someone can get in if I need help and carrying mobile with me even round the house and garden.Going out I look at the goalWhere I want to go then work backwards too avoid situations that will create more stress..There are lots of dragons to slay but you do eventually learn which are worth the effort and which can be avoided.

[GHOST]

I

[sallymk1]

Hi
Thanks to all, Brian I do like your Tasmanian devil. I have two cross breeds, one vaguely resembling a small German shepherd and one I've only had for about six months that I would not have a clue. Small black mainly terrier type thing that looks very like "nagging doubt" from Swinton insurance adds. None of friends or relatives have been able to figure out what he is made up of. Both are rescue dogs. I used to have Jack Russells and a Westie but sadly they are no longer here.
The funeral is bad and the feelings do get worse but thankfully the day is something of a blur now. Also I have very little concrete memory of the past month - maybe a defence mechanism. Like the others say it will get better - it has to. To all please continue to support as I am still in what seems to be a dark place but I want to help others too.
Bye for now, take care.

[Emz2014]

We're not going anywhere Sallymk  the forum is here as long as you need
It's a rollercoaster which can be bewildering, but in time the easier days will start appearing between the bad, and gradually the easier days increase.  Be gentle with yourself xx