Author Topic: Do you believe in the afterlife?  (Read 3977 times)

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Offline Brian71

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #30 on: September 12, 2016, 01:24:01 AM »
Just a revisit to this topic,  I don't think there is any afterlife,  I know that some people would like to think there is, as it gives us comfort to believe that is so.

I suppose the issue I have is the fact both my wife and I gave up religion some 30yrs ago, as neither of us could think of a single good thing it had contributed to mankind,  other than make certain individuals and some religious institutions very rich,  which is why my wife requested some years ago that her funeral should be a non religious service,  which it was.

So why is it a issue ?  you may ask,   well... because, if I accept that there is some form of afterlife,  then that also opens the possibility that there is indeed a God, as I believe the two are connected,  I don't think you can realistically accept one without the other.

I think deep down we would all like to believe,  religion played a signifiant part of my younger days, as my fathers family were very religious,  at one point there were 3 vicars in the family...true.. indeed even today the son of one of them is the vicar of a church in Nottingham.   When I was young we went to Sunday school twice,  morning and afternoon.
I remember once asking one of my vicar uncles some years ago what made him so absolutely convinced there was a god,   and he replied "Well Brian he has been paying me for the last 40yrs". :tongue:  I've also asked that same question of my neighbour who is also happens to be a retired vicar, having been in the church most of his life,  to which his reply was a little more sensible saying "Brian can you prove to me there isn't a god".

I think most of us want to believe there is,  but the rational part of me is of the opinion that religion has been the single largest scourge ever to have been inflicted on mankind causing millions of deaths down the centuries and is still happening today.
However in times of crisis, many of us will say a prayer silently to ourselves,  perhaps when a loved one is seriously ill, praying they will recover and pull through,  despite my sceptical opinion on religion, I also did exactly that during the night while I sat at the side of my wife's bed at the hospital just a few hours before she died.

When you look at history, and see how men use religion for their own ends, after all the Anglican church of England only came into being because Henry VIII wanted to marry his many wifes, and the Catholic church forbid it,    so in 1535 he started his own religion which we have throughout the UK today,  then in 1604 James 1st also decided to amend it and write his own versions.
Hence my scepticism,  don't misunderstand me,  I think the words of the bible and teaching are very good, few people would say otherwise, who could deny the 10 commandments are not a good guide to live one's life by, although the first 4 are only applicable if you believe of course.  However I think we will only truly know when we have passed on ourselves.

So that is why I'm so sceptical about there being any afterlife, because AIS said previously, I believe the two are connected and if you accept one is true then the other must be too, and if it gives comfort to people who do believe, who am I to deny them that comfort.

So endeth this sermon... :whistle:  Hope you all have a great day whether it be in this life or the next.
« Last Edit: September 12, 2016, 01:56:05 AM by Brian71 »

Offline Struggling

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #31 on: September 12, 2016, 08:35:16 AM »
I'm newly bereaved and so far have resisted what I want to do and go and talk to a vicar. I'm not religious but I would happily turn to religion if there was a guarantee that I would see my darling husband again. This is so hard to type, crying as I do it. In moments of logic and clarity I feel silly for thinking this way but it's like people have previously said, even non believers 'pray' in bad times and I am guilty of that too. I envy those who believe, they can't all be delusional together surely?
Our son who is 17 said he saw Dad a couple of days after his death. He was just out with his mates, nowhere special, and Dad suddenly appeared in front of him. My son said Dad was smiling at him and then gone. He came home to tell me and I just hugged him, burst in to tears and said I was jealous that he had seen him - I genuinely am. My son could even tell me what Dad was wearing - he didn't have to think about it which makes me realise that he totally believed it and therefore I must do as well. My daughter who is just like her Dad and a bit of a tough nut also believed him. She says she has heard Dad in the house, puffing on his vape pen once and then also coming up the stairs and coughing. I talk to my husband every day, kiss his photo, hug his pillow which i spray in aftershave and go to sleep wanting to dream about him but nothing yet. I rarely dreamed about him when he was alive but am so desperate to find that contact. It is just such torment and I know I am doing it to myself. I will read this later and feel silly I'm sure but this is me, right now, and it's just so hard.
I want to believe that he is now somewhere waiting or watching. I don't know what my life plans are now, my kids need me to be strong and I'm anything but. I have never spent much time alone in my life so don't know if I can do this for another 30 to 50 years (I'm 45). Rambling now so signing off x

Offline Brian71

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #32 on: September 12, 2016, 01:09:51 PM »
Struggling:

I think many people likely feel the same as you,  in another topic entitled "A Really Bad day" I wrote last night,  I ommitted to mention that I went into Hereford Cathedral while taking some walks yesterday, and sat in there for probably 45mins.

This is the 2nd time I've done that since my wife passed away,  read into it what you will,  what motivated me to do that?   I don't know because as you gather from the above post I am a religious sceptic.   The truth is of course.....deep down I think we all want to believe even people like you and I.

You mentioned your son claimed to have seen his Dad since his passing,  well on the evening of the same day my wife passed away I thought I saw my wife too in our bedroom.,  but rather than repeat it again.  Please take a read of my 1st post in this thread,  it's on the 2nd page. It was this aberration which prompted me to post on this topic in the first place.

You say " I would happily turn to religion if there was a guarantee that I would see my darling husband again"   sadly religion does not give any guarantee's,  I remember being taught that much,   it's about having self faith,  a faith I don't have and doubt I ever will,  I'm too much of a realist,  but I do know you yourself have to want to believe, without any doubts.   
Like you I envy people who have that faith a little, or do I? as religion is free, we don't have to buy it.   
If you think it will help why not have a chat with your local vicar,  it's a form of counselling like any other,  plus there's Cruse and your own doctor who may also put you in touch with people who can help with how you are feeling.    I went along just once and felt it didn't help me,  but who knows,  it certainly does no harm.

Your still young and have many years in front of you,  I'm glad you have family around you, sadly I don't, other than my daughter who lives 240miles away but she's the only one who phones frequently,  I'm 71 and an old fogey compared to you.   It will be tough, and it's still raw at the moment but with time you will slowly cope better and the crying will occur less, but it will be a very slow process,  it's been 5ths for me, and I still have bad days.
BTW "Never" feel silly when writing on here, think of this forum as a sanctuary,  a safe place where you can say what YOU want to say openly,  it's what makes this site so unique,  no-one will judge you here,  simply because we all are, or have gone through the same loss you have.   I'm 71 and some days I cry like a baby....to some people it may sound ridiculous,  but of course it's not something I tell others,  but somehow especially in your case for your children's sake you do have to be strong and we have to try and forge a life out of what's left....but it will take time, a lot of time.

Also don't worry about talking to your husband....I talk to my wife Ann frequently,  I tell her what I've been doing that day or news about the grand-children etc...anything really.   My eldest son is 47....older than you...lol,  my daughter is 40, and she is the only one who understands, as she misses her Mum terribly too,  my 2 sons grieving finished at the funeral and I rarely ever see them or hear from them.  They both have their own little worlds and families to keep them occupied and in reality never mention their Mum... it's almost as though she never existed...sad really.

As for religion,  I think of it as a "State of Mind"   if you think it might give you some comfort, then AIS who am I to deny you that,  you have to do what you want to do......and as for Rambling on....I do that continually...lol...that's why my posts tend to be longer that others on here.. :laugh:

You take care,  I'm only a PM away if you ever want to speak to someone,  and that applies to anyone else on here who have lost their wife or husband.    Sometimes it's good to talk to someone who is going through the same as you.

I wish you much strength through this terribly sad time in your life.....in reality there is nothing worse.

 :hug:
« Last Edit: September 13, 2016, 11:10:08 AM by Brian71 »

Offline Tony07

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #33 on: October 01, 2016, 08:45:45 AM »
I would like to tell you my experience regarding this question, and after this yes I do believe.............My Open Heart Surgery Story  – Vision, Near Death Experience, or a Visit to the Astral World............ Suddenly  (I don’t know for how long) I just felt all the questions I have been asking myself for as long as I can remember, I suddenly   knew the answers …Why are we here? It just felt like I knew everything, my thoughts started to become so logical and seemed to be effortless in coming to conclusions from questions I was asking myself.  I saw myself in this vision it looked nothing like me but I knew it was me, from what I was wearing it looked like I was in the stone age time, long black hair and I looked about 20ish. I died and then was laid to rest, time covered over me and I disappeared into the earth. I had lots of visits from other lives I have/had experienced, it was a very pleasant feeling. Then I saw what I assumed to be the force of all things, it wasn't a guy with long hair and a beard  either it was like a gigantic tree of  light. There were zillions of little lights swirling around it and I knew they were entities of people/beings that had passed on and were regenerating. This sounds crazy I know but I knew they were what we call souls. I have always believe in reincarnation but these (call them what you like) visions really meant something  to me.

Some experience or what, I am not afraid of dying now I know I will meet up with my love ones and then regenerate and go on another adventure until I have learned all I have to learn then  who knows, perhaps pass my knowledge on to  other lost souls  ???????

I often take comfort from this experience and thats why sometimes I feel like I am just waiting for the right bus to come along to start me on a new adventure.    (just my opinion)
amor vincit omnia

Offline Cee Cee

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #34 on: June 24, 2017, 01:41:48 AM »
 Having s strong faith, I have always believed in the concept of the afterlife. But having lost my Dad last Christmas and my very good friend a few weeks ago, I am questioning I beliefs.  Which scares me.  I constantly talk to my Dad and friend, looking up but then later feel as they are still by my side. I do feel their soul leaves us and wall among others around us, but only when they are ready to leave. My nephew was only 1 when my Dad passed and he held our family together and grows more like my Father by the day x 🎇

Offline Karena

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #35 on: June 24, 2017, 05:39:01 PM »
There is nothing wrong with questioning beliefs,I read a great deal of spiritual stuff after losing my husband,about

a lot of different beliefs.We don't know the answers and sometimes that's really difficult when we have been brought up with one set of beliefs,whether that's science or a religion.For me the solution was to believe that there are many possabilities and to embrace them all and rule out none.

Offline WOODY

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #36 on: July 03, 2017, 10:52:48 AM »
Hi to everyone here,
I have been very reluctant, to post on this topic, as I had a very bad experience of abuse etc, on another group forum, the person concerned, continuously targeted me, with abuse and insults, the admin had to step in, but nothing was done about this person, so I decided to leave the group, as I did not want any more abuse from this person.

My Wife was a Spiritualist medium and was a guest medium, regularly at several Spiritualist churches.
All our children have been named in the Spiritualist church.

Since my wife passed in December 2016, I am very aware that she is around me, I am always getting signs from her, when I have asked her about something, I talk to her all the time, as if she were here.

So yes, I totally believe that there is an afterlife.

Offline longedge

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #37 on: July 03, 2017, 12:17:33 PM »
Hi Woody,
As far as trolling is concerned, I've never seen any evidence of that on here at all. I use a number of forums (fora ?? ) for a variety of interests and sometimes you do have to have a bit of a thick hide and equally you sometimes come across other users who have an awkward way with words, like me, who sometimes come across as a bit of a grump but heh ho.......

On the topic of the thread, I'm still firmly astride the fence and accept that there are things that I don't understand or know about but that's as far as my sceptical mind lets me go  :smiley:
---------------------------------------------
I'll never get over losing her but,
one day I might learn to live with it.

        ~ I'm George by the way ~

Offline WOODY

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #38 on: July 03, 2017, 12:25:43 PM »
Hi Longedge,
Thank you very much for your reply. Much appreciated.
I do appreciate everyone's views, but I never get into arguments about it, as everyone is entitled to their opinion.

Offline Karena

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #39 on: July 03, 2017, 08:20:29 PM »
Believe me trolling is not allowed here.
We all have grief in common and this site is about mutual support and i know for some people the things people say too us in our outside lives can sometimes make us angry,who among us hasnt had someone say of the person we lost he/she is better off in the next place and found it upsetting as we quietly count all the reasons they would be better off here with us.
But we are not all the same and the variety of beliefs here is in my view actually a positive thing,because more than anything else this needs to be and feel like a safe space for everyone who comes here.Its fine to express belief or non belief as long as its not in a way which is offensive or upsetting or derogatory too others who differ.

Offline Maria66

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #40 on: October 11, 2017, 07:02:53 AM »
When my beloved father passed that morning about 4am my window flew open, curtains billowing into my room. My husband at the time and I both thought it must be bad wind out there. I got up and the night was still nothing. We couldnt make sense of it, but went back to sleep for a few hours.

My father was in hospital at the time. I had a phone call at 8am my sister rang me to tell me dad had sadly passed away in the night at 4am, the nurse was there attending him when he went.

I was bereft and collapsed and just lay on the bed for several hours curled up crying. I felt a hand patting me on my back, and turned around expecting my husband there was no one there.   I did think it odd but just curled back again sobbing in my grief. A few moments later i felt someone quite clearly sitting on the end of my bed it was a heavy person, so i sat up again and looked no one there, i did feel a little prickle of apprehension i must admit. Suddenly my dog Ben came up the stairs i think he heard me moving about. He jumped up onto the bed as he usually did for a cuddle, and suddenly without any warning his back and neck were hackles and he was growling and standing facing the exact spot i could feel someone. He was really angry and growling and staring, then suddenly he just turned around made a weird noise and ran down the stairs.   He never came back up to the bedroom.   I told my husband about it, and he felt it was just imagination. Yes if the dog hadn't reacted i might have thought the same.

Anyway several years later odd things happened, lights on which i never turned on. I had a picture of myself and dad on my fire mantel it had been there several years, and suddenly every morning it would be face down on the floor.   Odd things would happen. I got quite spooked.  A few months later i had a major collapse the first of my MS, and I still think today he was warning me.

In between this my daughter had her first son born in hospital with cesarean. She swore she saw my dad looking over him in his cot. Weirdly enough he is the spitting image of him now and its quite spooky.   My younger grandson one day was sat with his mum in the bed and he said "mum there is an older man i keep seeing he is sat on top of my curtain rail he has glasses and is big and he sits there smiling at me", odd weird, because he had never met him he was only about 4 i think at the time.   

My ex husband although we had been estranged would come to me a lot after his death, i could feel him, he was anxious about our grandson i dont know why but he would be there in my head telling me.

I feel my hubby around me now, but that is just grief i think. I wonder if its not so much an after life, but the energy of that person being strongly connected to someone who stays as i dont feel my father as much now.

I am not sure about after life but i wonder in reincarnation as honestly my grandson is the image of his grandad, and is very like him in character too.   I know family traits etc, but it was odd my daughter saw him looking down at him.

I feel my mum who passed last year. I kinda of hope there is an afterlife it just seems odd we just end.   

Offline Karena

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #41 on: October 11, 2017, 02:54:32 PM »
I dont know -no-one does - even science -and although science tries to deny it, that also is an evolving thing, as quantum physics has shown us. I believe there is something -i used to try and find rational explanations for things but so much has happened that it would actually be irrational to deny those experiences. :hug:

Offline Maria66

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #42 on: October 12, 2017, 05:08:02 AM »
Yes I agree with you.  We cant even prove how we all got here either. 

I read a brilliant book called chariot of the gods, and some of the things in there really made me think.

I also believe if believing there is an afterlife gives comfort it can only be a good thing really. x

Offline longedge

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #43 on: October 12, 2017, 09:49:48 PM »
Hi Maria66 - Your experiences sound a little bit scary. My own are very comforting and perhaps just a manifestation of my own longing. I often hear Chris call to me and I even answer sometimes before I realise what I'm doing. I sometimes wish that I wasn't such a sceptic  :smiley:.
---------------------------------------------
I'll never get over losing her but,
one day I might learn to live with it.

        ~ I'm George by the way ~

Offline Maria66

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Re: Do you believe in the afterlife?
« Reply #44 on: October 13, 2017, 05:32:44 AM »
Hi Maria66 - Your experiences sound a little bit scary. My own are very comforting and perhaps just a manifestation of my own longing. I often hear Chris call to me and I even answer sometimes before I realise what I'm doing. I sometimes wish that I wasn't such a sceptic  :smiley:.

Funny enough it wasnt scary i had a feeling it was dad all along.  A few days before he passed i was walking the dog in our park right opposite and i can swear he spoke to me in my head.   

I keep feeling Mike around me at the moment, but again that could be just the grief. x