.As a mother of two daughters all I can really say is that through the teenage years with all the rows,all the stuff they did but shouldn't have,and all the mistakes I made too,because none of us have a dictionary of perfect parenting,we never stopped loving each other, despite hard words and words spoken in anger,and if something had happened to me after one of those times there is no way I would blame them,or want to imagine they would blame themselves as you have.love for our children is unconditional.Even though the last words you exchanged were not I love you,the meaning was,because she wanted you to get medical help.
Other peoples opinions about being "over it" don't come from experience they cannot know or judge your emotions.Its not a case of getting over it,but of finding peace with it,and that's where counselling does help.
I had counselling after my husband died,I went with the surity that it wouldn't help and the first couple of weeks it didn't.If anything I felt worse,I wanted to ditch it,but was also at a point where I knew I had to do something.It doesn't " cure" you of grief,but it does help you find ways to cope with it and think differently around it,so please keep going if you can.We will be here to support you too if we possibly can.