Recent Posts

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Introduce Yourself To Us All / Re: Newbie
« Last post by Sandra61 on October 01, 2022, 09:55:02 AM »
Hello. so sorry to hear of what happened to you and your husband. I hope your dogs are still providing a reason for you to keep going. I haven't visited this website for a while, which I hope it evidence that things do get better with time. I first came here in 2017 after my mum died, so I am a lot further along this path of loss than you now, but although a loss is something I can't say you fully recover from, I can say it becomes something you learn to live with. I still have bad moments and bad days. October is a hard month for me. Perhaps that's why I'm looking in again just now, but if you take each day as it comes and get through them one day at a time, slowly the days get a little easier to cope with. When my loss was as new to me as yours, I found it helped to have flowers around and to take walks in the park. Being amongst nature and having beautiful flowers to look and their scent in the room reminded me that there were still good things in the world and helped calm me and helped me to cope somehow. I did find loss changed me as a person and I don't think there's any going back to who you were before that, but I think that's part of life and you just have to learn how to be the new person it makes of you. That takes time too, so please be patient and be kind to yourself. Look after yourself and remember to eat and drink enough ang just take things one day at a time. All best wishes and sending you a hug.  :hug:
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Introduce Yourself To Us All / Re: Lost without my beautiful wife
« Last post by Dave Administrator on September 29, 2022, 08:12:09 AM »
Hello Matt and welcome to this group.

First may I say how your post touched me reading it in as far as placing myself in your now very sad situation of loosing your beloved wife. So I truly felt your pain of being robbed of many more years together as she was so very young still.

Unfortunately this group is no longer as active as it used to be owing to a shutdown for over a month we couldn't suss why or how to fix it, so sadly members thought we had closed the forum and drifted away.

So may I suggest you please join our very active Facebook BUK support group where I promise you will get lots of support from the many very caring members we are blessed with there.

In the mean time may I wish you great strength and courage at this most sad and difficult time in your life Matt.

Dave.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/1566851883557388

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Introduce Yourself To Us All / Lost without my beautiful wife
« Last post by Matt James on September 28, 2022, 05:24:11 PM »
Hi All,

This is my first post and I'm not sure what I should expect to get from being here. It's not what I would ever have imagined doing, but here I am, a widower at 54. I'd also like to begin by offering my sincere condolences to all on this site. If we can share the pain, maybe we can reduce it a little.

My wife died on 5th September 2022 after a brain haemorrhage. She was 55, rarely had headaches, fit, barely a grey hair and not a single wrinkle. She was my world for 22 years and fate dealt the cruelest blow to me and my 2 teenage daughters, who were her best friends.

Coming to terms with this is just so hard and I miss her every minute of the day. I'm trying to be strong and compartmentalise work and the awful cold admin that's needed now, but I get so many triggers that take me back to the depths of despair every time.

I'm sure it's a common theme, but, waking up in the morning is like Groundhog Day, but a horror movie. Mornings are just a hideous cycle of triggers and tears and more recently, anger.

We have had the most incredible amount of support though, from family, friends, colleagues and associates. Without this I would have not been able to cope.

Things are still very raw, and I know it's going to be a long road to recovery, so, thanks in advance for any support provided here.

Matt

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Introduce Yourself To Us All / Newbie
« Last post by Milojoker on August 13, 2022, 06:12:22 PM »
Hi everyone, I'm a newbie here so I thought I would introduce myself, I'm newly bereaved 3 weeks today, Dave and myself were on holiday in northern ireland in our motorhome with our 3 dogs, Dave suffered a massive heart attack and despite having surgery he never regained consciousness and passed 23rd July aged 59, Luckily I managed to get our 3 sons over to help me get back home , and organise repatriation of Dave , the funeral was 9th August and to be honest if it wasn't for my dogs I wouldn't bother getting out of bed anymore I'm so lost, sorry for the long post
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General Discussion / Life without my br💔ther
« Last post by esther e on August 11, 2022, 06:10:00 AM »
It's no life at all. I never thought I'd feel this way. I never thought my brother would be one of  the missing. I never thought my brother my only sibling would be gone forever in my life and that grief would be life long. I can't go back though I wish I could turn back the clock. The only place I can talk about my grief is online and in a support group I go to. No one else wants to hear of my grief, it's been  8 yrs. I wish my brother knew how much I miss him and life at times is not worth living. I never  thought I'd have this feeling that life is not worth living, but without my brother in my life and the remainder of my life will be very lonely.
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Introduce Yourself To Us All / Missing my brother
« Last post by esther e on July 08, 2022, 06:41:29 AM »
I wished my brother knew how much he's being missed. My only sibling, how lonely life is now. How lonely life will be later. I never questioned life and do I matter thoughts in my mind until I loss my brother. I can be working and these thoughts just come in my mind, thoughts of s.i. My brother has been gone now 8 years, where did these years go. It's like grief with no where to go, silent grief. The years have passed and I'm nowhere closer to finding a reason. Questions remain unanswered. Wish I can turn back the clock.
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Introduce Yourself To Us All / My lovely brother
« Last post by Moj85 on July 03, 2022, 03:24:11 PM »
Thank you for letting me join the group. Although I wish I wasn't here.
My darling big brother died on Thursday the 23rd of June at 6pm from terminal bowel cancer. He was 41 and had fought cancer for five long years. He left behind a wife and young son.
Part of me died with him, my childhood companion. My partner in crime, someone who I knew inside out and who knew me the same.
I was with him as he took his final breath and kissed his body goodbye. I am both traumatised and honoured to have been there at that moment.
I am paralysed by grief. I can barely move, I feel like I have been hit by a truck. Does this get easier? For now I feel like I have no reason to be happy again, even though I have a young family and a lovely husband. Why do I have those things and he is gone? It makes no sense.
Hopefully my ramblings make some sense, thanks for taking the time to have read it.
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General Discussion / My brother's birthday today
« Last post by esther e on June 13, 2022, 01:43:35 PM »
Today would be my brother's birthday. He should be here, he'd probably be working and so would I. Later this evening would go to his favorite restaurant/thai food,he loved that place. We'd be singing happy birthday, he'd make some wishes and have some cake. But he's not here to do any of this,8 yrs of birthdays come and gone, in May was his 8 yr anniversary. Now, I take off of work,go to his restaurant, buy a cake, put a candle in it and make a  wish...
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Introduce Yourself To Us All / Self currently bereaved by Loss of Partner.
« Last post by Andy73 on April 24, 2022, 04:34:17 PM »
I am Male 73yrs old retired/disabled

My Partner of 21yrs Passed Away Suddenly In Her Sleep on April 2nd.22days ago and I just can’t get to grips with my Grief.

She was My Everything in a wonderful relationship we had together and Losing Her has me Destroyed inside and left alone,not eating, barely sleeping,I'm so Lost as I try to find a way forward,to accept the now situation.
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Introduce Yourself To Us All / Re: I miss him.
« Last post by Sandra61 on April 23, 2022, 08:24:27 AM »
So sorry to hear about your husband. Please feel free to say whatever you need to here. No one will judge you and we are all here because we too have suffered a loss, and we do understand. Writing and talking always help, so do try to open up to someone about what you have been through, even if you only start by writing down what happened and how you felt about it all and how you feel now in a diary entry or a letter to your husband. No one need ever read it, but just the act of putting it all down on paper can reallly help. Talk to us here whenever you want too. Sending you a hug  :hug:
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