Death of my son abroad on Valentines Day

[vertigo]

Hi, my son died in Argentina on Feb 14th. He was on holiday. He was 47. He lived in Sydney.
I visited him in January in Sydney. He was fit and healthy, worked out every day. I don't know how or why he died.
I am going mad. I had to get the body repatriated to Uk. Then organise the funeral. It was only a few weeks ago.
His dad attended but won't help with the costs which are massive. I have tried to speak to Cruse but no joy.
There is a long waiting list. I cry all the time. I am begging someone or something for some acceptance or answers.
I just found this site while looking at bereavementthroughaddiction site and thought maybe someone can offer some
guidance as to where I might get some counselling? I am angry all the time. My other children are coping poorly and keep their distance from me. My partner just gets upset when I cry and says I should stop snapping at him. I don't know where to go for help. There must be some somewhere.

[Norma]

Im so sorry for your loss, my heart goes out to you, there are no words that can make the pain go away, but you are among friends here who have gone through the loss of a loved one, and who do support each other, have you asked your GP for a referral for counselling, please keep talking to us and feel free to rant as much as you need to get the anger out of your system xxxx

 

[Hubby]

Hi vertigo. Welcome to the forum. I'm sorry to hear of your loss.

Counselling is something which appears very difficult to access especially at the time you think you need it most. The general consensus among counselling services is that they don't do any before three months after he bereavement and even after that there are long waiting times. I was quoted a 6 month wait for NHS counselling and I have another month to wait before I am eligible fog counselling from a local bereavement service.

CRUSE is not available in my area and when I tried their national counselling helpline they were always busy and took two days to get back to me. Not really what I needed when I was at my lowest.

While I wait I find I get some comfort from offloading a bit on here and a lot of comfort talking to the Samaritans. Just voicing my thoughts to an anonymous person at the other end of the phone seems to help me to make some sense of things. In the early days I phoned them every day, sometimes more than once, but now they contact me weekly though they are always available. Perhaps you could give them a try.

Wishing you strength. 

[Joann]

Vertigo, am so sorry for your loss and for what you are going through.

[Soleil]

Hi Vertigo,

Very sorry about the loss of your son. Tragic in every way. Please come here for support, you will get friendly people who have gone through much of the same. 

[Emz2014]

You might find it helps chatting with us here whilst you wait for or find counselling  xx

[Pauline Mc]

So sorry to read about your Son Vertigo.  It must be a terrible shock for you.

I lost my partner suddenly 2 years ago and this site was such a great help when counselling wasn't available.  You can say how you feel here without worrying whether you will upset loved ones.  I also found the evening chat room was a great help to be able to speak to others who don't judge and have some understanding of what you are going through.

Sending love xx