Author Topic: Re: Lasted 12 months  (Read 2996 times)

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Offline CarolineL

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Re: Lasted 12 months
« on: February 20, 2019, 05:25:13 PM »
Hi everybody, I am new to the forum but after reading your posts can see already that others feel the same way as I do. My husband of 32 yrs passed 8 months ago very suddenly and I keep thinking I must be through the hard part now, then the sadness just hits again. I sorted all the family stuff and all the finances which I had never done before, think Darren would be amazed if he was still here. I have had to make so many calls (as he dealt with everything) had to say out loud ' I have lost my husband, or He has died' so many times its like I am not really saying it its someone else and I'm just listening on the outside, know that sounds crazy. I have done all the things I was afraid of when he first passed, used to think once all the mundane everyday things were sorted out I would feel better but the reality is I don't, he's still gone. I find being out in the fresh air in the country walking my dog does me the world of good. My husband was a collector, I keep saying I am going to sort through his things and data base them, log and categorise , but just thinking about it is daunting. Take care, look after yourselves, its what our other halves would want x

Offline Emz2014

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Re: Re: Lasted 12 months
« Reply #1 on: February 20, 2019, 09:17:51 PM »
Having a dog is a true blessing.  Mine have gotten me through many bad times  :hearts: xx
Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise. 
Hold on in there xx

Offline CarolineL

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Re: Lasted 12 months
« Reply #2 on: February 22, 2019, 10:01:09 AM »
Yes, My daughter got me this lil puppy the month after losing my husband and what a blessing, she brings so much comfort. Keeps me busy too, talk to her constantly about my day, what I'm making for tea, hahahaha, neighbours must think I'm talking to myself. Gives me a reason to get up and get on. :laugh:

Offline Karena

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Re: Lasted 12 months
« Reply #3 on: February 22, 2019, 12:16:45 PM »

I know what you mean our dog was quite old and spent most of his day with my husband -so he was grieving too (and took a while to recognise there was a new hieracrchy) but he became the thing that kept me going and a constant companion as lack of sleep resulted in a lot of walking at odd times of night.

But I can beat you on neighbours and bonkers.  - since my dog died i have been talking too fish -

I never had any desire for fish but saved  a friends little girls tears (daddy was going to send it to blackpool because it (allegedly) ate other fish) what turned out to be a parrot fish arrived in a jug and i got it a small tank - fish dont need much looking after and only live a couple of years right ? what did i know - the little girl is now 15, and the fish is about 9 inches long and living in a massive tank taking up an entire corner of the living room. He is on his own because of his reputation, and given his attitude to the "toys" (who knew there were toys for fish)  i have put in there, it may be justified - poor lonely fish but rather than risk carnage in the living room i talk too him the most - he will take food from my hand, and i swear he trys to flirt with me to get attention - he has a certain way of coming the the front then swimming backwards.

Then the goldfish arrived  - one was won at a fair and immediately donated to me - my understanding was i would get a kids tank for it, then it (the tank) would go home with the grandson who won it - i got the tank, and the fish arrived with the grandson and never left ( the fish not the grandson)
Goldfish number two was rescued by same grandson from his friends house  - its tank broke and would i look after it temporarilly ( a year ago).
Goldfish number two didnt look too healthy and having nursed number one back from its traumatic fairground start in life i wasnt keen to put them together - No2 was also 4 times the size of number 1, so out came the original small tank.

 Most normal people would stick them into their garden pond or out of the way somewhere -theyre cold water fish - but no - - what if they freeze in the pond - what if a heron gets them, and what if another room in the house is colder and they are not as comfortable (comfortable !!  theyre goldfish for goodness sake) so why is the opposite corner of the living room now filled with two goldfish tanks -and  it gets better - positioned so they can see, therefore communicate with each other, and become "friends" before i find another tank big enough to house them both, on sale or swap.

Even i think i,m bonkers. :rolleyes:

Offline CarolineL

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Re: Lasted 12 months
« Reply #4 on: February 28, 2019, 04:57:01 PM »
You did make me giggle reading this.  :rofl: I am animal crackers and so are my children, its amazing what good company they can be. Love and hugs

Offline Karena

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Re: Lasted 12 months
« Reply #5 on: March 01, 2019, 11:20:57 AM »
I was going to get chickens i have room - and of course i was never going to eat them - just the eggs - they were going to wondering around freely clucking and of course they would all have names - my eldest daughter pointed out the likely vets bills of all these "pets" and the image of sitting in a vets waiting room with a chicken  was quite funny but our nearest vets is a 30 mile trip- so that idea went out of the window.
But i now have 3 dogs who come to me for holidays,
and a rescued pigeon - now free but he keeps coming back daily,  and hedgehog rescue season is about to begin - i rescued two when i first moved here, they survived, and suddenly i,m some kind of wildlife rescue expert as well as fish sanctuary.

But on a more serious note, it makes such a difference to be able to get outside - nature is a healer -and  it doesnt make demands or have expectations of how you should be feeling the way people often do.
and a dog will watch you cry and make no comment yet offer comfort and stay by your side.

I made a mistake about the fish, the "little girl"  is actually 16 now. :rolleyes: