Author Topic: New to this  (Read 1211 times)

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Offline Katthechimp

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New to this
« on: April 22, 2018, 12:26:29 PM »
Hi,

I lost my husband (44) on 12th April I’m 37.

Finding it so overwhelmingly hard.  I miss him so much and would do anything to have him back.

How do you carry on?

Offline Emz2014

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Re: New to this
« Reply #1 on: April 22, 2018, 07:45:38 PM »
Sending you a welcome hug  :hug:
It's a hard rollercoaster journey, but you are not alone here. Xx
Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise. 
Hold on in there xx

Offline stephenpaul

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Re: New to this
« Reply #2 on: April 23, 2018, 01:26:07 PM »
Hi,

I lost my husband (44) on 12th April I’m 37.

Finding it so overwhelmingly hard.  I miss him so much and would do anything to have him back.

How do you carry on?

It isn't easy at all. I am still struggling to deal with the loss of my wife. I find my reactions come in waves. Sometimes I can cope, at others times I just burst into tears and I know this will happen for a long time to come, but being on here with people who are going through a loss should help.

I have been to two counselling sessions including one this morning via Cruse Bereavement Care. You can find that on the internet. I was guided there by a friend.


Stephen.


Offline Lost675

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Re: New to this
« Reply #3 on: April 23, 2018, 10:35:27 PM »
Hi and sorry you find yourself in the situation everyone here is also in. I'm only 3 months down the line from losing my husband but I can say I know those first few weeks feel so desperate but time does change things as you go along. I too couldn't imagine how I could carry on without him but as the days have turned into weeks/ 3 months and I have begun to find some sort of revised routine, the awful sudden gut wrenching waves of grief have become a more constant sadness which somehow seems a little easier to bear - I guess because I'm getting used to the feeling always being there. Hope you find some comfort in the words you read on this site, it's certainly helped me to know there are others out there coping with the same feelings. As lonely as we are we are not alone in this.

Offline Karena

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Re: New to this
« Reply #4 on: April 24, 2018, 11:04:18 AM »
Hi and welcome -i am much further down the road - it is seven years since i lost my husband -and it was the second time for me. I dont think i will ever go back to being the person i was and still occasionally feel overwhelmed - with grief and loneliness -i have learned to cope with it, accept it as a part of me just like any other chracteristic  -and i think that is what we do -starting one very small step at a time, frequently sliding back into despair in the beginning less frequently as time passes.We start to build a fence round the gaping hole they have left behind. As the new person we become emerges, sometimes we dislike that person intensley as we go through being guilty, angry, anxious, lack confidence, and are filled with yearning for the past. Other people around us change or change in their relationship with us as we do. Some move away from us,but new people,and new interests emerge, and now i dislike myself less.I still miss him -both of them - But even though they are not physically here,they are still very much present in my life, my beliefs, thoughts, and actions are defined by them.
Being here was a lifeline for me -somewhere to write down what i could never say out loud, but also somewhere that, through the grief we all have in common, we find companionship, share the daily trials of everyday things as well as grief.
If like me, when i first came,you wonder why there is a laughing emojie,and cant imagine a time that you will ever have a reason to use it, i hope that like me,one day you will. :hug: