Bereavement counselling

[Kes1968]

I had my first appointment with the bereavement counsellor today, it was really hard, I’ve got to learn to let my emotions out and I don’t feel comfortable with that yet, I’ve had to be strong for so long it will be a steep learning curve, I nearly ran for the door thinking I’m not ready for it yet but I’ll give it a try

[GHOST]

I

[Kes1968]

Thanks, yes I’m probably of the same opinion but I’ll give it s go, it’s just something I feel I need to try and of it doesn’t work well that’s that,

[Emz2014]

Dont forget there are many different types of counselling, all coming from different training.  I went for counselling years ago but she just sat staring at me, expecting me to just talk at her.  It was rubbish!  But I know now to avoid that type of counselling and there are better options - ask them about their style of training if in doubt

Also dont forget the rapport with the therapist makes a difference too - if its not working sometimes it needs to be a different person xx

[Kes1968]

Dont forget there are many different types of counselling, all coming from different training.  I went for counselling years ago but she just sat staring at me, expecting me to just talk at her.  It was rubbish!  But I know now to avoid that type of counselling and there are better options - ask them about their style of training if in doubt

Also dont forget the rapport with the therapist makes a difference too - if its not working sometimes it needs to be a different person xx

She seems nice enough and encourages a two way interaction, I felt uncomfortable initially with opening up to her, I’m sure it will get easier as it goes on

[Karena]

I had little faith in it but the antidepressant route had been disastrous and made me physically ill so it was the only option left on offer.-I spent the first two sessions blubbing and came away thinking it was making things worse -  In the end i was so very glad i stuck it out - because the lady did understand and there wasnt a text book in sight - she simply took some of the things i said and got me to turn them round and  think of them in a different way. So i would say hang on in there it can get better and really make a difference.

[Kes1968]

I had little faith in it but the antidepressant route had been disastrous and made me physically ill so it was the only option left on offer.-I spent the first two sessions blubbing and came away thinking it was making things worse -  In the end i was so very glad i stuck it out - because the lady did understand and there wasnt a text book in sight - she simply took some of the things i said and got me to turn them round and  think of them in a different way. So i would say hang on in there it can get better and really make a difference.

thanks karena, yes I think I will try to stick it out, if only to offload once or twice a week, though as Monday's session was somewhat intense, I think once a week will be enough for the moment! I'm due to see her again on 2nd January before I go away, so an opportune time.

[mummyof433]

Hello lovely, I too am awaiting counselling for bereavement and I too don't feel ready to let it all out as I have been strong for too long as well and I can't accept my mum is gone x

[Kes1968]

Hello lovely, I too am awaiting counselling for bereavement and I too don't feel ready to let it all out as I have been strong for too long as well and I can't accept my mum is gone x

  I hear what you're saying, I don't want to accept my mum has gone, I lost her in February but to be honest it feels  like only yesterday, I've missed her so much lately especially with it being Christmas, its my first one without her and its been bloody hard. I wish you all the best with the counselling, I hope it helps.

[Twinkle]

I have had both, I personally did not find the bereavement counselling that helpful, but it may have been too soon for you, it was for me, the second Christmas without Mum, she died in August 2017 first Christmas a blur, this one really really hard, so alone, anyway, after bereavement counselling I tried two others, just normal counselling, finally this one clicked she was able to help me deal with the PTSD that was part of mine, BUT nothing can stop grieving, and nor should it, I miss Mum and Dad every second of the of day, 18 months on I finally am actually embracing grieving for them, I am so sorry for your loss

[Rebecca]

Hello I’m Rebecca and I’m recently bereaved, i lost my partner on the 15th December 2018, how long do you wait before u seek counselling??

[Emz2014]

I am not sure if there is a typical timescale but I think often there is a period because grief is a natural process which needs time to unfold/progress along the journey.  There are so many emotions with grief and it really helps to talk about your loss - whether thats with family, friends or seeking professional help.
Its worth having a look at the Cruse bereavement website, at the 'about grief', 'supporting yourself' section.  They can also offer bereavement counselling xx

[Rebecca]

I’m new to this, may I ask what brings you here emz2014?