Welcome Thea. friends dispearing is something many of us have experienced i think they dont know what to do or say and so return to their normal lives theyre not being mean just that its a circumstance they cant relate too. Like you i was also not some-one who could ask for help - i had bereavement counselling when my husband died and told the councellor that, and she said that in a way we are hurting them by not asking - its like they offer us a gift and we dont take it - its not a physical gift but a gift of love, i didnt really understand that until later when a friend did that to me - so dont be afraid to pick up the phone - you dont have to ask for help just ring for a chat or to see if they want to come over or meet somewhere for a coffee. I have a link to South Africa i was not far from east London ( by south african distances) a few months ago in Port Edward area.I have a daughter son in law and grandaughter in the Kloof area close to Durban.I love being out there it is stunningly beautiful, and there are some amazing people, but i can also understand how being on your own there may have some extra difficultys we think about more rarely in the UK,so its even more important to have people around you perhaps there than here.
Coming to this site definitely helped me because it was somewhere i could write but also get replies from people in the same boat, we are all at different stages of this roller coaster that is grief its been a few years for me now but that doesnt mean i have forgotten those early days - so keep coming back and keep talking we will be here as long as you need us.
Sometimes it is not just the pain and the big things we miss so we have an everyday chat section - just somewhere to talk about the everyday stuff that we would have said too our loved ones, it helps reduce the lonliness a bit. When i first came here i never imagined i would use that laughing emojie i thought it was a strange thing to have on a bereavement site but i use it a lot now because its a journey not just about grief but also about learning how to manage our lives and laugh at ourselves when we make mistakes.
