BEREAVEMENTUK SUPPORT FORUM

General Category => General Discussion => Topic started by: Dring1 on January 03, 2019, 07:37:26 PM

Title: A friend struggling
Post by: Dring1 on January 03, 2019, 07:37:26 PM
Recently my best friend has lost her husband in a motorbike accident in July. She is really struggling to deal with this. I’m struggling because of that. I have only been up to see her just before Christmas to see her and she doesn’t look well. I want her to see a councillor but don’t want to force this on her. I have been bottling things in since the accident and recently I have been emotional and have lashed out at a couple of people. I have been struggling sleeping and keep waking up thinking about her and what to do. I’m not sure if this is a normal reaction or not. I have txt her today seeing if she will talk but isn’t feeling to good. Really need some advice on how I go about this and if anybody thinks I’m pressuring her. She basically took me under her wing at work and we have become reallly good friends and this is really hard for me
Title: Re: A friend struggling
Post by: Karena on January 04, 2019, 05:12:21 PM
 :hug: its good that you are looking out for your friend - i dont think you are intending pressuring her at all -  but really difficult to tell you how you can help her - sometimes we have to work through this on our own - potentially rather than going to her to get her to talk you could create a situation in which you give her the opportunity too but she doesnt have too - keep away from the booze perhaps, but a walk or a quiet cafe might present that opportunity  to ask whether she has considered counselling and then get the information on what is available where you are for her -  the other thing you could do is point her over to this forum because sometimes just writing helps, but also it is easier to talk to some-one who has shared the experience but who can also be some-one you dont know or need to face. she would be very welcome.