Author Topic: Back to work  (Read 1820 times)

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Offline Sean88

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Back to work
« on: February 05, 2018, 10:50:53 PM »
So its been 5 months since i took time off work to care for my gran and through her sickness and after hee death have been kind of self inposed house arrest now tommorow im going for a meeting about a job im so nervous and restless but i dont think about getting the job more about leaving the house and being around people and not being home with my family im actually borderline scared any tips is this normal ? I just finished a lovley big frame with a collage of pictures of me and my gran which felt good to do since ice finished that i feel lost again ?

Offline Emz2014

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Re: Back to work
« Reply #1 on: February 06, 2018, 08:38:58 AM »
Its very unsettling losing a loved one, and natural to want to retreat.  It can feel safe hiding away in our 'caves', but over time it can also do us harm as we become more isolated.  I'd say some fear would be totally normal, a new job can feel scary, at the moment your family represents safety.

I think there's a couple of ways you can approach this, for me I would imagine your nans words - what would she say to reassure you or build your confidence - and imagining she is watching over you go and do your best, make her proud

Also, break it down into steps so it's not as daunting, our imagination often runs away without us realising, before we've even got the job we're scaring ourselves about the people, first day/month! So think of it in stages - its just a chat to start.  See how it goes. Its a brief trip out of the house, like a practice run. Good luck  :hearts: xx
Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise. 
Hold on in there xx

Offline sallymk1

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Re: Back to work
« Reply #2 on: February 06, 2018, 02:20:33 PM »
Hi Sean
This will be one of your biggest tasks. It represents a step back to normality when everything else still feels abnormal. I have had to apply for another sick note but I know this will be my last and therefore need to think about returning to work after three months. What is the job you are going for? Is it something you have done before, will you be working by yourself? Lots of things come into play as to what you are able to do. If it is a totally new job you may not have the difficult moments with people not knowing what to say.
Take it as it comes, try to do some relaxation before you go, there are many forms available. Anxiety will be the biggest problem. You may like to think about what the consequences of not performing well. Usually this is only that you do not get the job. Good luck and I hope you get whatever it is you want from this.  :coffeetoast:
Pam

Offline Sean88

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Re: Back to work
« Reply #3 on: February 06, 2018, 03:01:24 PM »
Thanks for all your kind words im.going back to a previous job so i kinda know it but doing something new and nobody knows about my loss so kinda easier today has bern so hard after seeing a little girl in town with her grandmother brought back memories and i could barley gold it together in town had a good cry when i got home though.

Offline Karena

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Re: Back to work
« Reply #4 on: February 07, 2018, 03:38:09 PM »
I think seeing things like that is part of our reluctance to go out -and constantly be faced with other people who are just going on as usual.

I used to hate seeing couples even more so the ones who dont even speak too each other or fall out over the price or brand of a tin of beans -when i got back to work some-one was moaning about his wife wanting a certain colour kitchen unit -and just wanted to scream at him -what does it matter just be glad she is still here.
It does get better and i certainly dont notice it as much now or let it bother me.

If you are worried about panic attacks try carrying something with you thats is grounding in some way -a pebble from her garden , a quartz crystal  something that reminds you of a better time in life and a calm place. I have a gem stone bracelet -which is even better than something in my pocket because i can just see it and feel it there without having to put my hand in my pocket.It reminds me of the place i bought it and putting in the sea to clean it on the most beautiful beach takes me back too the calmness of that place.