Author Topic: Feeling angry  (Read 1130 times)

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Offline Rose93

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Feeling angry
« on: May 10, 2018, 08:06:18 PM »
Hello!

I don’t really know where to start to be honest. I lost my best friend 4 months ago at the age of 24. She was completely fit and healthy and died from a sudden cardiac arrest a condition known as SADS. I know people say it all the time but she was my sister, not just a friend. We were apart of each others families and had 13 wonderful years of friendship. To say I am so completely lost is an understatement.. I just don’t know what to do. She was so full of life, never let anything get her down and so enthusiastic about absolutely everything. Its not fair- i know in life we aren’t owned anything, nothing is a given! I’m not religious and I know I won’t see her again. This makes me so sad and I have a pit inside my stomach when I think about it but I can’t cry. I have also been feeling so angry lately. Before this I was quite a moody person to be honest and I loved my own space. But when I didn’t get it I just got on with it. Now whenever I’m around people- even siblings and friends I just feel so on edge and just want to be left alone and if this doesn’t happen I just get so angry. I have never been aggressive in my entire life but today I was just so overwhelmed with just a casual chat in the garden with my brother and mum that I threw a beer bottle and smashed it. ( I wasn’t drunk)  I have such a short fuse. Lots was happening, the dogs were barking people talking over each other and I just couldn’t deal with it. Whenever I feel like this I count to 10 and take a deep breath- any other suggestions?

Offline Karena

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Re: Feeling angry
« Reply #1 on: May 11, 2018, 01:20:58 PM »
 :hug:sending you a warm welcome, so sorry you lost your friend like that it must have been such a shock and close friends like that not only rare but often closer especially through our teenage years than familly.Anger is a normal part of grief so what you are describing isnt something you are alone with. Sometimes counting to ten just isnt enough though is it. :hug:

It will pass, but it needs to be expressed. More gentle ways can be in writing or art and by expressing it, -the injustice, the unfairness, your feelings of utter loss that are  fueling it, you create less chance of the hot rage outbursts happening.
When you feel one building though different things work for different people.

There is a hill behind my house and the way i dealt with it was to walk up it as fast as (age and infirmity allowing) i can -By the time i get too the top -or before that i,d worked it out of my system if not then the view from the top helped to be calming too. Not everyone is lucky enough to have a conveniently placed hill but if you can find a park or a safe space, then brisk walking or jogging might work and a pair of earphones will put off the interuptions and block distractions, only once again -please make sure its a safe space to be doing that.

Others here have driven out to remote places and screamed -thats not for me but i think it helped them. Also a bottle bank and a stash too deposit in it -if you have one nearby -that way you can throw bottles without comment from or harm to anyone.