Author Topic: Dementia/change of personality before death  (Read 2225 times)

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Offline Simon

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Dementia/change of personality before death
« on: September 23, 2018, 02:58:20 AM »
Hello. I am wondering if anyone here who has lost a loved one experienced that person changing a great deal in their personality, whether due to dementia or similar factors, or for less concrete reasons. I had heard of this happening but was totally unprepared for it to happen in my own life, so when some months ago my father became ill it was doubly hard to deal with as his mind as well as body seemed to change overnight.  It may be helpful to hear how others have dealt with this sort of thing.

Offline Karena

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Re: Dementia/change of personality before death
« Reply #1 on: September 24, 2018, 12:35:21 PM »
Hi Simon,
I think all cases are different, however i have heard about this and seen it with friends parents - in one case an apparently amiable chap who pootled around, helped his wife as she was quite frail and was a loving husband for sixty years, suddenly started being violent towards  her  - and in another, a woman who had been very controlling as a mother suddenly became more loving, more accepting of his friends and totally different in personality.  In her case i think it was  the Victorian values and self control she had been raised with, and  had maintained in her own relationship with her son were gone, and in the first case, frustration and fear - because it must be terrifying when your normal cognition is disconnected. Imagine if you opened your mouth to say something and the wrong words came out, if you couldnt process what others were saying to you, or you knew you were hungry or cold but couldnt help yourself or ask some-one else to help you resolve that. 
My husband died of a stoke but it wasnt the first one and in between he was more prone to losing his temper, with himself as much as us, something i had never seen in him before. but it was frustration at the physical problems but also the fear caused by that loss of connection in the brain that created it.You can see your hand move but it isnt connected to your thoughts its as though its some-one elses hand  - or you cant find your mouth with your spoon, you cant speak properly so people dont hear what you say, you cant remeber how something you used every day works.
I know stroke is not the same as dementia, but it is the same process i think of the normal neuro connections in the brain being damaged whether it is being done over time, or quite suddenly.

Offline Simon

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Re: Dementia/change of personality before death
« Reply #2 on: September 24, 2018, 11:13:10 PM »
Thank you Karena, that is immensely helpful and greatly appreciated.

Offline Karena

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Re: Dementia/change of personality before death
« Reply #3 on: September 25, 2018, 11:21:36 AM »
Glad to be of help Simon. :hug: