Author Topic: Lost  (Read 1736 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline sallymk1

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 27
  • Karma: +1/-0
Lost
« on: January 23, 2018, 05:18:32 PM »
Two days to go before the funeral. I feel so alone, utterly lost and bereft. I can't eat, can't sleep and cry all the time. Even the dog is fed up, when I sob out loud she takes herself away into the garden for ages. I can't make sense of anything. Will it get any better after the funeral? Which by the way I am dreading for the reason if anyone speaks about Brian or tries to comfort me I sob even more. I know there will be a lot of this at the funeral. I don't know how I am going to cope.

Offline Emz2014

  • Administrator
  • VIP Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1904
  • Karma: +130/-0
Re: Lost
« Reply #1 on: January 23, 2018, 08:41:40 PM »
Sending you hugs  :hug:  its hard, we try and predict what the day will be like and that drives alot of fear.  You will be surrounded by people who care, try not to put expectations on yourself for that day.  Break it down into parts, and tackle each bit as a goal in itself (like getting up, getting dressed, getting there).  Try and let the day unfold without adding pressure to yourself xx
Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise. 
Hold on in there xx

Offline Karena

  • Administrator
  • VIP Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2132
  • Karma: +145/-0
Re: Lost
« Reply #2 on: January 24, 2018, 02:57:19 PM »
 :hug:what Emz said -but also so what if you do cry -if we cant do that at a funeral where can we.

After the funeral - i think might depend on your feelings about what a funeral symbolises -your beliefs etc for some the inaction after running round making arrangements chosing songs etc means they feel no better for a while to come - and also some people really do believe you are ok once the funeral is over and their support starts to drop off -the support here does not though and there will be some of those around you who have been on this journey, who know and will remain by your side.
Its a roller coaster journey sometimes you climb up slowly and painfully, only to drop down the next dip but gradually the dips get less deep and the up slopes easier to climb.

Your dog isnt fed up of you -she just doesnt understand the noise created by sobbing. We communicate with them by tone of voice rather than words -they recognise rom how you say something when your pleased or cross with them but this is a new tone.She is probably also very much aware of your sadness but doesnt understand that she hasnt created it.Over time she will and then you will find she stays to comfort you.