BEREAVEMENTUK SUPPORT FORUM
General Category => General Discussion => Topic started by: dizzylizzy on June 18, 2017, 08:39:08 PM
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So it's been 16 months now since I watched my mum die. I've survived. I have coped - with my two wee kids mostly on my on because my husband in Armed Forces. It's not got any better. In fact I think now the shock has worn off the emptiness I'm left with is worse than ever. I'm yearning to see her. I feel envious when I see other people with their mums. I know that's awful but I can't help it. I look at my children and feel such sadness that they don't know her. Is this the anger stage? I just realising I'm going to live with this sadness forever. I don't share my feelings really. I say I'm ok but at night alone I cry myself to sleep. I just had to let this out somewhere. Maybe sharing how I'm feeling will help. I've been reading other post and I kno I'm not alone in feeling such grief more than a year on xx
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Talking about it really helps, it certainly helped me :hearts: the sadness will change over time, it's been 4 years since I lost my dad, I still think of him most days, sometimes feel really sad and miss him, some days smile from the memories. They never leave us, but in time it gets easier to cope. :hearts: xx
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I have written on your other post as really understand what you are saying about how you feel. Do you have good friends you can talk to about it?
My children keep me going but the sadness I feel when I think about them not knowing my dad who meant the world to me, breaks my heart into a million pieces.
I decided to take antidepressants after feeling like things just weren't getting better-started them 3 weeks ago and they are so far a positive thing. I still cry for my dad most days but I feel a little more able to cope with the sadness. Not sure if it would be something you would think about but if you are really struggling you could talk to your doctor. Don't feel you have to struggle on alone - 16 months is no time at all compared to the whole lifetime that you had your mum. I feel the same xxx